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Its beginning to feel like we are just friends or roommates.

I increasingly feel lonely, unsatisfied, unloved, and empty.

And rather than ignore the lusty elephant in the room, some military couples have created their own defense against infidelity: the so-called deployment sex pact.

I first heard about this unusual agreement a year ago, from a military wife.

Looking for Love and Sex Online is Old News For the better part of the past two decades online bulletin boards like Craigslist, dating websites such as e Harmony and Match.com, and endless pay-for-play sexual hookup websites have provided the single, lonely, horny, cheating, or simply bored man or woman with the fastest and most direct route to meet, date, romance, and/or simply have sex. As modern life has shifted away from the home or office-based computers and become all about the smartphone, we now have apps that allow us to literally "hook-up" on the go.

Smartphone "friend finder" apps like Ashley Madison (for marrieds and partnered individuals seeking "out of the roost" sex), Skout and Blendr (for single straight men and women), Grindr (to find male-male partners) or Pink Cupid (to find lesbians and bisexual partners) -- among many others -- are actually friend finders . households now own at least one smartphone, it seems reasonable to assume that increasing numbers of people are eagerly following this app-created breadcrumb trail to sex with strangers wherever and whenever time and circumstances allow.

Megan, a single medical student in her mid-20s, talks about her sex app experience: When out at a club a few months ago I decided to give one of these apps a try and turned on Blendr.

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In crowded urban areas these apps often locate multiple people within a mere few hundred feet!In addition to the emotional anguish loneliness creates, it also has devastating effects on our mental and physical health.Loneliness depresses our immune system functioning, increasers inflammatory responses that put us at greater risk for cardiovascular disease, and can literally shorten our longevity.So, it was not shocking when news broke about four-star retired Army Gen. Most civilian women would not defend their husband’s infidelity.But for the military wife, cheating practically comes with the territory.

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How does one react to anxiety in the relationship without always becoming defensive? Each of us is left with a basic question: How does the grace of Christ meet us in the midst of emotionally charged, often over-spiritualized, life-encompassing performance anxiety?

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